SFGate.com reports that Terrell Owens attempted suicide Tuesday night, albeit unsuccessfully.  Owens was prescribed pain medicine for the broken hand he suffered in last week’s game.  Owens’ friend told Dallas police that Owens told her he was depressed.  The anonymous friend then witnessed T.O. place two pain pills in his mouth, and noticed that the bottle for the prescription was empty.  Rescue workers later asked Owens if we was “trying to harm himself”, to which he replied “Yes”.

Before we get into it, is anyone taking this seriously?  Well, I’m not.  This is classic Terrell Owens.  Everyone was just about ready to give him a chance to prove that he is a normal human being this year, and this is validation for why he’s not to be trusted.  Ever.  If he thinks he can generate sympathy with one pathetic little staged suicide attempt, I’d hope we’d all be smart enough to give a collective “Go ahead, do it.  I triple-dog dare you.”  Seriously, I’m calling his bluff on this.  Expect this headline within the next few months: TERRELL OWENS ADMITS HE’S A BIG BABY BITCH AND LACKS BASIC SOCIETAL SKILLS PAST THE KINDERGARTEN LEVEL.  Then, and only then, will I consider him to be a citizen of this planet.