Akcht.. never thought I’d say this but I have to admit I feel pretty bad for the little tike. Man. I mean.. before you go all ballastic on me… yes, she has to (and should have) served her sentence in full. It was a travesty that she was sent home BUT… god damn… going home only to have to go back to jail? That sucks donkey balls. Having been in prison once (county, but not GP), I’ve made a solemn oath NEVER to return. 24hrs was MORE than enough. And what’s worse… it’s actually the fault of the damn sheriff. Who the F does that a-hole think he is? Some beaurecratic douche decides he’s “the man” to decide who should be where and when only here’s the catch… he has no right (legally or morally) to do it. Jerk off..

 Don’t worry Paris… we still love you and fantisize about you naked.

Paris outside of LA County Jail minutes after her release.

Google trends reports that stories reporting Paris Hilton leaving jail early are “Volcanic”. Wow, “that’s hot.”

ha…get it….get it?!

We just love pole vaulting so much that we had to feature this phenominal athlete. oh…and because she’s ridiculously smoking.

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Reported on Kansas City.com, information on missing 18 year old girl Kelsey Smith is not only recieving a one time $5,000 reward but based on this website, NBC is offering a whopping $5,000 per week for the rest of your life!

mmmm….look at her young supple body!

The so-called “Spam King” Robert Alan Soloway has been arrested! Wooo hooo!

Although I have to say that I really enjoy the 523 “Penis Enlargement” and “Buy This Stock Now!” emails I get in my inbox everyday. I mean, I probably spend a good 45 minutes on average sifting through and deleting emails with images of hard penises in them.

And how about the emails about the latest $600,000, 2% fixed rate mortgage that I have been pre-approved for when all I have to my name is $23 in my checking account and a savings account that’s in the negative. How did they know my 552 point credit score was so good?

Here is indictment papes…check it here!

So a buddy of mine got a message on his myspace account from “an African woman” who, telling by her profile picture, was pretty hot. So he opened it up and to his dismay, realized that this poor nubian princess was in “a world of financial peril” and was suffering from “governmental persecution” and desperatly needed money to pay for a flight to flee her impoverished state. To make matters worse, or funnier, she made it clear that she was madly in love with him and once she recieved from him the thousands of dollars she requested wired into her account that she would come to him in the US and they would live happily ever after.

This AIM exchange is from one of her most recent tries at getting money from him. Oh, and he has some fun with her in the process…

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Pretty cool stuff! and great video press release…i’ve never seen a video press release before.

http://www.campusfood.com/press/mobile-phone-ordering.asp

good times..

COME ON!!